Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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