love makes seman taste better
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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