the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
