im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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