i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
