i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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