he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
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Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
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There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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