Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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