everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize