i just wanna soil my oats bro
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
