I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
