Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
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