The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
