Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
