very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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