Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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