Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize