I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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