Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees