I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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