Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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