and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Randomize
