he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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