Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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