is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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