You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
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