This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
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So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
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What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
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