thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
