Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
