Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
