Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
