he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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