This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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