the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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