My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
