i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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