Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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