dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
She's like a pop up book from hell.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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