I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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