Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
