Say something about gay babies.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Randomize
