They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
