Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(443): View more from Maryland

Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.

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(314): View more from Missouri

I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.

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(256): View more from Alabama

my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table

(1-256): View more from Alabama

whatd she say to you?

(256): View more from Alabama

no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle

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(778): View more from British Columbia

working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.

Fav 37 1184 6684
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters

Fav 83 11866 2384
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(847): View more from Illinois

That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.

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(601): View more from Mississippi

And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.

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(416): View more from Toronto

Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it

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