guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
