Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
