some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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