Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
