There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize