How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
