my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
nutella sex= disaster
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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