She's JV to your varsity
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
