he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
